I really wasn't expecting to be able to take part, but while watching telly a couple of nights ago I began scribbling something that sort of represents how I've been feeling for a week or two, and so - here it is. As I said in my last post, my Annual Review is coming up, and I've finally decided (I think) that I'm going to ask about pump therapy.
You can probably sense my uncertainty about my decision in the drawing. Essentially I see two ways forward. One way ('Switch to Levemir') might offer a slight improvement to control with the inconvenience of an additional time-fixed basal dose every day. No problem most of the time, but on occasional nights out/parties/holiday travelling possibly slightly 'in the way'. I'd also have the hassle of sorting out my new basal pattern(s), of course. Lots of testing and tweaking for a good few months. So minor improvement, but still a bit of a faff.
The other way forward is to switch to pump therapy. A full explanation of what I'm feeling about this, or expecting from will have to wait until later, but in summary: potentially major benefits, but much more of a faff.
All you dear pumping friends who have been telling me for the past few years how great pumping is and how you'd never go back despite its shortcomings have got me to a point where I at lest feel I need to ask the question. You never know they may just say I'm not eligible for funding (HbA1c too good, hypos not bad enough, wrong hat size, moon in jupiter...).
But at least I'm going to ask.
There is a bright light ahead, but I'm feeling a bit lost about it and I don't know (can't know at this point) which the 'best' way forward is. 'The path of least resistance' is to go back the way I came and choose nothing. But I'd rather walk towards the light.
Update: Reviewing my review
